Lecture Transcript 2-04

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ROCHESTER INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY
FEBRUARY 4, 2004
COMMON TEXT SERIES
PRESENTER: ANTHONY SWOFFORD

>> HI, EVERYBODY.

WELCOME TONIGHT.

HAVE A SEAT.

WE'RE GOING TO START IN A FEW

MINUTES, VERY SHORTLY.

THERE'S STILL PLENTY OF SEATS

SO GET YOURSELF SEATED.

>> GOOD EVENING.

CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION,

PLEASE?

WE'RE GOING TO START.

GOOD EVENING.

I AM PROFESSOR MARK PRICE, AND

AS CHAIR OF THE COMMON NOVEL

COMMITTEE OF THE DEPARTMENT OF

LANGUAGE, LITERATURE AND

FOREIGN LANGUAGES IN THE

COLLEGE OF LIBERAL ARTS, IT'S

MY PLEASURE TO WELCOME YOU TO

THE THIRD AND FINAL LECTURE OF

OUR WINTER QUARTER SERIES ON

ANTHONY SWOFFORD'S HISTORICAL

MEMOIR "JARHEAD."

ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE OUR

INTERPRETERS FOR THE EVENING,

COLLEEN FREEMAN AND CATHY

DERRICK.

WE HOPE YOU'VE HAD THE

OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE ATTENDED

OR VIEWED OUR TWO EARLIER

LECTURE FOR THIS QUARTER,

WHICH ARE PRESENTLY AVAILABLE

ON THE WALLACE MEMORIAL

JARHEAD COMMON NOVEL WEB SITE,

AS WELL AS THE FALL QUARTER

LECTURES, WHICH ARE STILL

AVAILABLE IN VIDEO STREAM

FORM.

TONIGHT, HOWEVER, IS VERY

SPECIAL BECAUSE ANTHONY

SWOFFORD, WHO PREFERS TO BE

CALLED TONY, IS HERE TONIGHT

IN PERSON TO SPEAK ABOUT HIS

OWN WORK.

THIS YEAR MARKED A DEPARTURE

FROM THE TRADITION OF OUR

DEPARTMENT IN THAT, IN

PREVIOUS YEARS, WE HAVE ALWAYS

SELECTED A PIECE OF FICTION TO

BE THE COMMON READING

EXPERIENCE FOR STUDENTS IN OUR

WRITING LITERATURE COURSE.

WHEN TONY'S WORK "JARHEAD" WAS

SELECTED LAST SPRING AS THE

OVERWHELMING FIRST CHOICE, WE

KNEW THAT WE WOULD SOON HAVE

TO RENAME OURSELVES THE COMMON

TEXT COMMITTEE, AND ALL OF

THIS IS DUE TO THE STRENGTH

AND DARING OF TONY'S CRAFT,

WHICH HAS ENCOURAGED US TO

CONSIDER OTHER TYPES OF

WRITING FOR OUR STUDENTS'

APPRECIATION.

SINCE ONE YEAR AGO, LAST

FEBRUARY, WHEN "JARHEAD" WAS

FIRST RELEASED, THE RECEPTION

OF AND RESPONSE TO IT HAS BEEN

NOTHING SHORT OF ELECTRIFYING.

JUST LIKE TO ADD AS A

FOOTNOTE, TALKING TO TONY WHEN

HE GOT IN THIS AFTERNOON, HARD

COPIES OF "JARHEAD" ARE UP TO

225,000 COPIES SOLD.

IT'S NOW AVAILABLE IN

PAPERBACK AND IT'S GOING INTO

TRANSLATION IN EUROPE.

WITH THE PRECISION WE WOULD

EXPECT OF A FORMER MARINE

SNIPER, ALONG WITH A

MEDITATIVE CALM WE WOULD

EXPECT TO FIND IN A WRITER

YEARS OLDER, TONY LEADS US

THROUGH THE DAILY ROUTINES OF

A MARINE JARHEAD, SHARES WITH

US INTIMATE MOMENTS IN HIS OWN

PERSONAL LIFE, AND THEN

FINALLY EXPOSES US TO THE

CARNAGE OF WAR IN GRAPHIC AND

HORRIFIC DETAIL.

WE BECOME WITNESS TO TONY'S

BEARING WITNESS, AND I DOUBT

IF WE ARE EVER QUITE THE SAME

WHEN WE FINISH AND PUT DOWN

HIS BOOK.

TONY SWOFFORD JOINED THE

MARINE CORPS IN DECEMBER OF

1988, IMMEDIATELY UPON HIS

GRADUATION FROM HIGH SCHOOL.

HE LEFT THE MARINES IN 1992,

AND IN 1993 HE BEGAN HIS

UNDERGRADUATE EDUCATION, FIRST

AS A PART-TIME STUDENT AT

AMERICAN RIVER COMMUNITY

COLLEGE IN SACRAMENTO,

CALIFORNIA, AND THEN LATER

COMPLETING HIS B.A. IN ENGLISH

IN 1999 AT THE UNIVERSITY OF

CALIFORNIA, DAVIS.

IN THAT SAME YEAR HE ENROLED

AS A TEACHING FELLOW AT THE

PRESTIGIOUS IOWA WRITERS'

WORKSHOP, WHERE HE RECEIVED

HIS M.F.A. IN 2001.

DURING 2001/2002 HE SPENT A

YEAR IN PORTLAND, OREGON,

WORKING ON JARHEAD AND

TEACHING AT LEWIS & CLARK

COLLEGE WHERE HE OFFERED A

FASCINATING COURSE ON WAR AS

PART OF THE INVENTING AMERICA

PROGRAM.

AT PRESENT, HE IS AN ASSISTANT

PROFESSOR OF ENGLISH AT St.

MARY'S COLLEGE IN CALIFORNIA,

TEACHING FRESHMAN COMPOSITION

AND GRADUATE NONFICTION ESSAY

WRITING.

AND TONY IS AT WORK ON A NOVEL

CURRENTLY TITLED "EXIT A:

1940-2003 IN CHICAGO AND

TOKYO" WHICH TONY DESCRIBES

AS, QUOTE, "NARRATIVES LINKED

TO CHAIN REACTION AND

HIROSHIMA AND NAGASAKI."

AND TONY HAS PLANNED A BIT OF

A SURPRISE FOR US TONIGHT IN

REGARD TO THIS NEW NOVEL.

AN INTERVIEW IN THE "CONTRA

COSTA TIMES" REPORTS THAT TONY

ADHERES TO REGIMEN OF WRITING

AT LEAST 1,000 TO 1,500 WORDS

A DAY FOR SIX DAYS A WEEK, AND

HE IS THE FIRST TO ADMIT THAT

HIS YEARS OF MARINE DISCIPLINE

ARE NOW WHAT PREPARE HIM FOR

HIS DAILY WRITING REGIMEN.

I KNOW THAT AS EDUCATOR, WE

ARE PROUD TO NOW HAVE TONY

SWOFFORD IN OUR PROFESSION,

AND IT IS MY EXTREME PLEASURE

TO INTRODUCE HIM TO YOU NOW.

I GIVE YOU TONY SWOFFORD.

(Applause)

>> GOOD EVENING.

THANKS FOR THE INTRODUCTION,

MARK, AND MY THANKS TO THE

COMMON TEXT COMMITTEE FOR

SELECTING MY BOOK AND AS WELL

FOR UNDERTAKING THE MAJOR TASK

OF RENAMING THE COURSE,

BECAUSE THAT TAKES A LOT OF

WORK, AT LEAST AT St. MARY'S

COLLEGE, IT DOES.

WE RECENTLY WANTED TO RENAME A

FEW COURSES IN OUR GRADUATE

PROGRAM AND IT'S GOING TO TAKE

ABOUT TWO YEARS TO GET THAT

DONE, BECAUSE THE REGISTRAR

CONTROLS EVERYTHING, WE'VE

LEARNED.

IT'S KIND OF LIKE THE MARINE

CORPS AROUND HERE.

THEY'LL BIT YOU YOUR WATER BUT

THEY MAKE YOU SCHLEPP IT DOWN

THE HALL YOURSELF.

I'LL PROBABLY TALK FOR 30, 35

MINUTES, AND THEN OPEN IT UP

FOR QUESTIONS, AND MY TALK

WILL INCLUDE SOME READINGS

FROM "JARHEAD," AS WELL A

SCENE FROM THE NOVEL THAT I'M

CURRENTLY WORKING ON.

CAN YOU ALL HEAR ME?

I'M GOING TO MOVE THIS A

LITTLE.

ALL RIGHT.

YOU CAN HEAR JUST FINE, EVEN

WHEN I'M HERE?

OKAY.

GREAT.

MOST IMPORTANTLY I FORGOT TO

THANK YOU STUDENTS, WHO ARE

READING THE BOOK CURRENTLY OR

HAVE BEEN.

SOON YOU'LL BE AT WAR WITH

ESSAYS ABOUT "JARHEAD," AND

HOPEFULLY MY PRESENCE ON STAGE

TONIGHT WILL ASSIST YOU WITH

YOUR WORK.

AS WELL HOPEFULLY YOU WON'T

DESCRIBE ME AS A TONY SOPRANO

LOOK-ALIKE BECAUSE OF THIS

KIND OF MAFIOSO TYPE PICTURE

ON THE BACK.

PEOPLE KEEP ACCUSING ME OF

THAT.

I'VE ONLY SEEN THAT SHOW ONCE.

IT WAS FAIRLY GOOD.

I CAN'T REALLY REMEMBER WHAT

HAPPENED, BUT I REMEMBER THE

WRITING BEING FAIRLY STRONG.

I DON'T REALLY WATCH TV.

I PROBABLY WEIGH ABOUT THE

SAME AS TONY SOPRANO.

I'M ABOUT 50 POUNDS

OVERWEIGHT.

IN THE MARINE CORPS THEY CALL

IT YOUR FIGHTING WEIGHT.

BUT I'M STILL A FIGHTER IN

SOME WAYS.

MY FRIEND AND MENTOR, CHRIS

OFFUT, WHO'S A GREAT WRITER

AND HE TEACHES AT THE IOWA

WRITERS' WORKSHOP, ONCE SAID

ABOUT ME THAT I ENTERED

ADULTHOOD AS A WARRIOR AND

EMERGED AS AN ARTIST, BUT I

THINK THAT ALL ARTISTS ARE

WARRIORS.

FIRST THEY MUST DO BATTLE WITH

BIOGRAPHY.

IN THESE TIMES, TO PROCLAIM

THAT ONE WANTS TO BE A WRITER

IS BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE POOR

FISCAL POLICY.

I HAVE TAUGHT STUDENTS WHO

WERE BUSINESS OR ENGINEERING

MAJORS BECAUSE THEY WANTED

JOBS AT THE END OF THEIR

ACADEMIC WORK, AND I HAVE

TAUGHT ENGLISH MAJORS WHO

FRIGHTEN ME WITH THEIR NEAR

TOTAL OBLIVIOUSNESS TO THE

MARKET.

(Laughter)

AND BECAUSE THEY REMINDED ME

OF MYSELF.

EVEN SCARIER.

BUT I'LL NEVER DISCOURAGE A

BUDDING ENGLISH MAJOR.

BUT SIMPLY PUT, IF YOU WANT TO

MAKE A LIVING, YOUR DECISION

TO DO SO AS A WRITER IS A BAD

IDEA.

THE PERSON PAYING YOUR COLLEGE

TAB, WHETHER IT BE A PARENT OR

YOU, YOURSELF, WILL PROBABLY

DEMAND A HIGHER RETURN ON YOUR

EDUCATION DOLLARS.

IN HOUSES ALL OVER AMERICA,

YOUNG WOMEN AND MEN ARE BEING

DISCOURAGED FROM THE WRITING

LIFE.

WISE PEOPLE WHO LOVE THEM, WHO

LOVE THEM VERY MUCH, ARE

ASKING THEM THAT THEY BECOME

DOCTORS OR LAWYERS OR FILM

PRODUCERS.

BUT BEWARE THE QUIET WOMAN

WITH DREAMS.

SHE IS A WILD BEAST AND SHE

MIGHT GO ON TO STUDY BUSINESS

AND SHE MIGHT PRACTICE

BUSINESS OR MOTHERHOOD OR BOTH

AT THE SAME TIME, OR SHE MAY

PRACTISE MEDICINE, BUT SOME

DAY THE WRITER IN HER WILL

EMERGE.

THE CONTEMPORARY AMERICAN

WRITER, ANNIE PROULX,

PUBLISHED HER FIRST BOOK IN

HER 40s.

AS WELL, BEWARE OF THE QUIET

MAN WITH DREAMS.

WILLIAM CARLOS WILLIAMS AND

GUSOV LOBAIRE WERE COUNTRY

DOCTORS WHO STUDIED AND

PRACTISED MEDICINE BECAUSE IT

WAS EXPECTED OF THEM.

MY BIOGRAPHY LED ME TO THE

YELLOW FOOTPRINTS OF MARINE

CORPS BOOT CAMP IN SAN DIEGO.

BUT MY HEART LED ME OUT OF THE

MARINE CORPS AND MY MIND LED

ME TO LITERATURE AND NEED,

PURE NEED LED ME TO PICK UP

THE PEN AND TRY MY OWN BEST

SHOT ON THE PAGE.

NOT LONG AFTER BEING BURNED

THROUGH THE BLOODY CANAL OF

BOOT CAMP, MY MIND STILL

CLUTTERED WITH THE JUNK OF MY

MILITARY INCARNATION, RIBBONS

AND MEDALS, RIFLE BADGES,

NOMENCLATURE, MARINE CORPS

HISTORY, POLICIES AND

PROCEDURES, LAWS OF WAR, THIS

KNOWLEDGE AND THESE DANGLING

ACCESSORIES WRAPPED AROUND MY

NECK LIKE A YOLK STOCK.

I REALIZED THAT JOINING THE

MARINES HAD BEEN A POOR

DECISION.

I HAD, NOT UNLIKE CELINE'S

BARDAMU, STOOD FOR MY FEET IN

THE CAFE OR WITH A FRIEND I'D

BEEN BUSY SMOKING, DRINKING

AND LOOKING AT THE LADIES AND

JOINING THE COLONEL'S MARCH

THROUGH THE BRICK STREETS.

I WAVED AND SAID GOODBYE TO MY

FRIEND, BUT FOR THE SOUNDS OF

BUGLE AND TANK TRACKS, HE DID

NOT HEAR MY FAREWELL.

WHILE AT BARRACKS DUTY SCHOOL,

I FURTHER DECIDED MY

ENLISTMENT WAS A POOR

DECISION.

I PERFORMED MORNING

CALISTHENICS, CLEANED MY

WEAPONS, SHOT MY RIFLE,

SHOTGUN AND PISTOL EXPERTLY,

AND THEN, DURING THE SIXTH

WEEK OF BARRACKS DUTY

TRAINING, THE CAPTAIN CALLED

ME TO HIS OFFICE.

THERE HAD BEEN A BUDGET CUT,

AND THE SCHOOL HAD TO RID

ITSELF OF THREE TRAINEES AND

SEND THEM TO THE INFANTRY.

THE FLEET MARINE FORCE, THE

READY COMBAT FORCE OF THE

MARINE CORPS.

NOW, RATHER THAN STANDING

GUARD DUTY, IN MY HANDSOME

UNIFORM IN FRONT OF A NAVY

NUCLEAR OR MISSILE FACILITY,

I'D BE DOING WHAT I WAS

SUPPOSEDLY MADE FOR, HUMPING

UP STEEP MOUNTAINS OR THROUGH

THICK JUNGLE WITH 100 POUNDS

ON MY BACK, SWEATING AND

CUSSING IN MY WRINKLED

FATIGUES, WITH A LARGE TARGET

ON MY CHEST, U.S.M.C. GRUNT.

I WAS NUMBER 3.

NUMBER ONE HAD BEEN PRIVATE

SO-AND SO, WHO FOR WEEKS TRIED

FOR A PSYCH DISCHARGE AND HAD,

IN HIS LATEST ACT OF DEFIANCE,

MASTURBATED ON THE CAPTAIN'S

DESK.

NUMBER TWO WAS A YOUNG MAN,

PRIVATE SO-AND-SO, WHO TRIED

FOR AN ADMIN HOMOSEXUAL

DISCHARGE, MAKING PASSES AT

THE BASE M.P.s, WEARING A PINK

BOA WHILE ON GUARD DUTY.

BUT DURING THE CAPTAIN'S

WEEKLONG REVIEW OF THE

PAPERWORK, HE DISCOVERED THAT

THE YOUNG MAN HAD BEEN

SCREWING THE CAPTAIN'S

DAUGHTER.

SO IT GOES WHEN YOU SCREW THE

CAPTAIN'S DAUGHTER.

WHEN YOU'RE IN, YOU'RE IN, AND

WHEN YOU'RE OUT, YOU'RE OUT.

THE CAPTAIN HAD FOUND MY DRUG

WAIVER.

AT BOOT CAMP, DURING

IN-PROCESSING, I CONFESSED TO

USING DRUGS, SOMETHING I

HADN'T DISCLOSED PRIOR, PRIOR

TO SIGNING MY ENLISTMENT

CONTRACT.

PART OF THE REASON I HAD

SPOKEN UP WAS THAT, ON THE

THIRD DAY OF BOOT CAMP, I

WANTED MORE THAN ANYTHING NOT

TO BE IN BOOT CAMP.

I'D SLEPT 6 HOURS IN TWO DAYS;

THEY'D SHAVED MY HEAD AND

INSULTED ME WITH HUNDREDS OF

SPECTACULARLY PROFANE PHRASES

AND SHOVED MY SHAVED HEAD INTO

A CHALKBOARD.

I WANTED TO GO HOME AND SLEEP

WITH MY GIRLFRIEND AND PAINT

HOUSES FOR MY FATHER AND DRINK

BEER WITH MY BUDDIES.

I REMEMBERED THE ROOM, GREY

INDUSTRIAL CARPET, BLUE

PLASTIC SEATS, SCARLET AND

GOLD PAINT, MARINE CORPS AND

U.S. FLAGS.

TEN OR FIFTEEN OF US WERE IN

THIS LAST PHASE OF BEING

ADMINISTRATIVELY HARASSED, THE

FINAL FLUSHING OUT.

ALL DAY RECRUITS HAD BEEN

STANDING UP AND ADMITTING

THINGS THEY HADN'T TOLD THEIR

RECRUITERS, GAY, ASTHMATIC,

SLEEPWALKER, ILLEGAL ALIEN,

FELON, FRAUDULENT HIGH SCHOOL

DIPLOMA, BED-WETTER.

DRILL INSTRUCTOR BERKE

EXERCISED US TO KEEP US ALERT.

HE BARKED ORDERS AND PACED IN

FRONT OF US.

I KNOW YOU CUM-RECEPTACLES

HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL ME.

I KNEW YOU'D LIED TO MY MARINE

CORPS.

IF IT'S DRUGS, WE'LL FIND IT.

IF YOU'RE A PUFFER, WE'LL

CATCH YOU IN THE SHOWER AND

WE'LL FIND THE COCK MAGAZINE

UNDER YOUR RACK.

FAGGOTS, ARE YOU?

YOUR FAGGOT BUS TO HOLLYWOOD

LEFT TEN MINUTES AGO.

LET ME GUESS.

YOU KEEP EXERCISING, LADIES,

AND I'LL FIGURE YOU OUT.

DON'T DO ME ANY FAVORS.

YOU, CALIFORNIA BOY, SWOFFORD.

YOU SURE ARE PRETTY.

THAT'S SOME PRETTY BLUE EYES

YOU'VE GOT.

YOU SURE YOU AIN'T A HOMO?

I KNOW YOU LIED ABOUT

SOMETHING.

EVERY ONE OF YOU LIED.

IT'S MY JOB TO FIND IT OUT OF

YOU.

PUSH-UPS.

HONESTLY, FELLOWS, WHAT I'M

DOING HERE IS A FAVOR TO YOU.

I'M GIVING YOU AN OPTION.

YOU TELL ME NOW, WE WRITE IT

DOWN IN OUR BOOK AND IF IT'S

NOTHING MAJOR, WE FORGET ABOUT

IT.

ONCE YOU'RE IN THE FLEET

MARINE FORCE AND THEY FIND OUT

YOU LIED IN YOUR CONTRACT,

THEY'LL PUT YOU IN THE BRIG

RIGHT AWAY.

DO YOU WANT TO GO TO THE BRIG,

SWOFFORD?

SIR, THE RECRUIT WILL ADMIT

SOMETHING, SIR.

DON'T LIE TO ME, YOU WORTHLESS

CUM RECEPTACLE.

I ADMITTED TO FORMERLY USING

COCAINE FOUR TIMES, L.S.D.

TWICE AND MARIJUANA ONCE, TO

SORT OF KILLS THE IDEA THAT

MARIJUANA IS THE BRIDGE DRUG.

(Laughter)

AT ANY RATE.

I CLOSED MY EYES AND PISSED MY

PANTS AS DRILL INSTRUCTOR

BERKE SCREAMED IN MY EAR THE

WORDS FAGGOT, ADDICT,

CUM-SUCKER, BITCH MASTER, DICK

SKINNER, DICK FUCK,

FUCK-FOR-BRAINS, NO-PECKER AND

LILY-WHITE BITCH.

PRETTY IMPRESSIVE.

(Laughter)

I SPOKE TO THE COLONEL ABOUT

MY DRUG REVELATION.

I'D HOPED HE'D SEND ME HOME

BUT HE ORDERED ME TO PERFORM

100 PUSH-UPS AND SAID IT WAS

EMBARRASSING FOR EVERYONE THAT

I PISSED MY PANTS AND TO SAVE

PISSING MY PANTS FOR COMBAT.

HE SAID HE THOUGHT I'D BE A

GOOD MARINE SOME DAY AND HE'D

TRY TO KEEP MY BARRACKS DUTY

CONTRACT FOR ME.

BUT AFTER 14 WEEKS OF BOOT

CAMP AND SIX WEEKS OF BARRACKS

DUTY TRAINING, THE CAPTAIN

SENT ME TO THE INFANTRY.

WHEN FIRST ARRIVING AT CAMP

PEMBLETON, I SPENT THREE DAYS

ON A WORK CREW.

MY SINGLE DUTY WAS CHANGING

THE MARQUIS AT THE BASE

THEATER.

I DON'T RECALL THE TITLES OF

THE MOVIES.

THOUGH I'M SURE THEY WERE

EITHER HYPER-PYROTECHNIC

COMBAT STORIES OR SORRY LOVE

STORIES, MORALE BUILDERS.

ON THE THIRD AND FINAL DAY OF

MY DUTY, I SPELLED "FUCK IT

SHOWING ALL DAY."

AN OFFICER'S WIFE NOTICED THE

MARQUIS AS SHE LEFT THE BASE

BEAUTY PARLOR AND SHE CALLED

THE THEATER MANAGER, A GRUNGY

OLD FIRST SERGEANT, AND

COMPLAINED.

I CORRECTED THE MARQUIS AND

PERFORMED CALISTHENICS THE

REST OF THE DAY, LONG INTO THE

EVENING, IN THE BACK PARKING

LOT.

THE FIRST SERGEANT SAUNTERING

OUT EVERY 15 MINUTES TO ALTER

MY PUNISHMENT FROM PUSH-UPS TO

SIT-UPS TO CHERRY PICKERS AND

BACK.

WHEN THE PROJECTIONIST TOOK

HER SMOKE BREAKS, SHE'D LAUGH

AT ME CALLING ME A GREENY AND

A NEWBY.

SHE WAS AN OLD MARINE WIFE,

AND WHILE THE POPULAR LITERARY

COMPULSION IS TO TELL SEEDY

RUMORS ABOUT FEMALE

PROJECTIONISTS OR TO RECOLLECT

FILTHY ENCOUNTERS INVOLVING

THEM, I CANNOT, FOR TO DO SO

WOULD BE PURE FICTION.

THE WRITER ALSO MUST DO BATTLE

WITH EGO.

AND OFTEN EGO IS TIED TO THE

NEED TO WRITE.

MY SERIOUS PROBLEM, THE

WRITER'S SERIOUS PROBLEM, IS

THAT IN ANY WORK OF

LITERATURE, THERE IS NO SPACE

FOR EGO.

ROOM EXISTS FOR THE EGO AT

DINNER PARTIES OR ON PARTY

LINES OR DURING WATER COOLER

CONVERSATION, SCUTTLEBUTT, WE

CALLED IT IN THE MARINE CORPS.

BUT THERE IS NO ROOM FOR EGO

ON THE PAGE.

IN "JARHEAD" I INTRODUCE

READERS TO A YOUNG SAVAGE, A

MAN WHO WANTS TO KILL FOR HIS

COUNTRY.

HIS NAME IS MY NAME.

HE HAS BEEN LURED INTO THIS

LIFE BY THE PROMISE OF

BECOMING, IN THE WORDS OF

DRILL INSTRUCTOR SERGEANT

SIEK, A MEAN, GREEN KILLING

MOTHERFUCKER.

THERE IS NOTHING IN HIS

PATHOLOGY THAT SHOULD MAKE HIM

A BETTER KILLER THAN ANYONE

ELSE, BUT HIS FAMILY DOES

SUFFER A HANGOVER FROM THE

VIETNAM WAR, A DARK CLOUD THAT

ENCIRCLES, AND HE REALIZES

MANY YEARS LATER DAMAGES WITH

WORSE THAN A HEADACHE, MUCH

WORSE THAN A HEADACHE.

EVERYONE IN HIS FAMILY.

HE DOESN'T KNOW IT, BUT HE'S

AFTER THAT MYSTERY IN HIS

FATHER THAT IS CALLED VIETNAM.

HE'S AFTER THAT MYSTERY WHEN

HE JOINS THE MARINE CORPS.

AND HE'S LURED INTO THIS

SEARCH WITH THE AD MAN'S

CHEAPEST TRICK: SEX.

MARINE CORPS RECRUITERS ARE

TRAINED WITH THE SAME MANUALS

THAT USED CAR SALESMEN USE.

AT ONE POINT IN THE BOOK,

SERGEANT SIEK IN FACT GATHERS

US ALL AROUND AND TELLS US

THAT WE'RE WORTH ABOUT AS MUCH

AS A LOT FULL OF YELLOW 1976

TOYOTA COROLLAS.

NOT A VERY EXPENSIVE CAR, EVEN

IN '88.

THE MARINE CORPS IS A SEXY

ROADSTER, AND THE RECRUIT IS

THE SEXY BASTARD BEHIND THE

WHEELS, IF HE SIGNS HIS

SIGNATURE ON THE DOTTED LINE.

THEN HE'LL OWN THE KEYS.

THE TONY SWOFFORD IN "JARHEAD"

WAS LURED WITH CRUDE STORIES

OF PAID-FOR SEX IN EXOTIC

LOCALES, AND ALSO WITH THE

POSSIBILITY OF KILLING.

SHORTLY THEREAFTER, HE

SUFFERED A PECULIAR PSYCHOSIS.

HE BECAME THAT MEAN, GREEN,

KILLING MOTHERFUCKER THAT

SERGEANT SIEK AND OTHERS TRIED

TO MAKE HIM.

I HAVE CALLED THIS PSYCHOSIS

TEMPORARY, BUT I KNOW THAT YOU

NEED NOT GO VERY FAR TO FIND

FORMER MARINES OR EVEN CURRENT

MARINES WHO INSIST THAT IT IS

LONG TERM, PERMANENT,

EVERLASTING.

THE SWOFFORD IN THE BOOK IS

THE SWOFFORD "I" CHARACTER.

HE IS YOUR AGE, MOST OF YOU,

AND I DO NOT WANT TO MEET HIM

ON A COLD STREET IN ROCHESTER.

WITHOUT RIDDING EGO FROM

"JARHEAD," MY WRITER'S

PERSONA, MY AUTHORIAL SELF, I

WOULD HAVE PRODUCED AN UNEVEN

BOOK, A STORY BLOATED WITH

ROMANCE AND SACRIFICE AND

GLORY.

I WOULD HAVE OFFERED THE

PENTAGON VERSION OF WARFARE,

THE OFFICIAL VERSION, RATHER

THAN OFFERING WHAT I DO OFFER,

A BOOK STRAINING UNDER ITS OWN

BRUTALITY AND SAVAGERY, A

STORY UNAFRAID OF ITS OWN DARK

HEART AND THE REPERCUSSIONS OF

EXPOSING THAT DARKNESS.

THE RESULT OF KILLING THE EGO

IS ART.

I WAS ONCE GIVEN A HORRIBLE

DUTY THAT WE CALLED SHITTER

DUTY BECAUSE THE GUY UNDER MY

CHARGE WHO MADE IT TO THE

SCENE, RECOGNIZED IT, A GUY

UNDER MY CHARGE FELL ASLEEP ON

FIRE WATCH, SO MY SNIPER

PLATOON MISSED SOME RIFLE

TIME.

AND I HAD TO DO A BUNCH OF--

KIND OF A STANDARD PUNISHMENT,

WHICH INCLUDES PUSH-UPS AND

SIT-UPS AND THESE THINGS

CALLED BENDS AND THRUSTS.

SO I'LL ASK SOMEONE TO

DEMONSTRATE IN A FEW MINUTES.

BUT MY PUNISHMENT GOT WORSE

THAN THAT.

BUT MY PUNISHMENT IS NOT OVER,

NOT WITH SHITTERS NEARBY.

THE SHITTERS IN THE REAR VARY

IN SIZE AND DESIGN, AND WHILE

IT MAKES SENSE FOR THE NUMBER

OF SHITTERS TO CORRELATE TO

THE NUMBER OF MARINES IN THE

REAR, YOU RARELY DISCOVER SUCH

LOGIC EMPLOYED.

A REAR AREA WITH 500 MARINES

MIGHT HAVE ONE THREE-HOLER OR

TEN THREE-HOLERS, DEPENDING ON

VARIOUS TACTICAL FACTORS, SUCH

AS HOW FAR THE COLONEL IS

WILLING TO WALK FROM ANY POINT

ON THE PERIMETER TO A SHITTER.

THE SHELL IS USUALLY MADE OF

PLYWOOD.

IF THE ENGINEER ACQUIRED

ENOUGH WOOD, OR FOR WHATEVER

REASON WAS FEELING CREATIVE

THAT DAY, THE SHITTER MIGHT BE

FULLY ENCLOSED WITH TWO SIDE

ENTRIES AND A PITCHED CEILING,

THREE OR FOUR STEPS FROM THE

GROUND TO THE SHITTER PROPER,

AN ACTUAL SEAT RATHER THAN A

HOVER HOLE, SHIT-PAPER

HOLDERS, SCREENS, MAGAZINE AND

NEWSPAPER RACKS, A BOOKSHELF,

EVEN ONCE A SOLAR-POWERED

RADIO.

THE DEPOSITORY'S ALWAYS HALF

OF A 50-GALLON OIL BARREL.

IF THE ENGINEER WAS IN A FOUL

MOOD BECAUSE HE HAD ONCE AGAIN

BEEN ORDERED TO BUILD A

SHITTER FOR THE LOUSY GRUNTS,

THE SHITTER WILL BE A PIECE OF

PLYWOOD, A JAGGED HOLE IN THE

CENTER, PLACED UNSTEADILY ON

TOP OF THE HALF OIL BARREL.

A MARINE ON SHITTER DETAIL

DOESN'T CARE WHAT THE SHITTER

LOOKS LIKE.

HIS ONLY CONCERN IS THE

BARREL.

IF HE'S LUCKY HE WILL BE ON

DETAIL WITH A PLATOON MATE SO

THAT THE TWO MEN WITH COMPLAIN

TO ONE ANOTHER AND FEEL GOOD,

EVEN THOUGH THEY KNOW THE REST

OF THEIR PLATOON IS AT THAT

SAME MOMENT EITHER DOING

NOTHING AT ALL OR PERFORMING

AN EASY TASK, SUCH AS STACKING

HEAVY BOXES OF AMMUNITION.

THE JARHEADS BURNING THE

SHITTERS ALWAYS WISH THEY WERE

STACKING AMMUNITION, BUT THE

JARHEADS STACKING AMMUNITION

NEVER WISH THEY WERE BURNING

THE SHITTERS.

IF YOU ARE A SERGEANT AND A

GRUNT AND YOU WANT TO TAKE

CARE OF YOUR JARHEADS AND KEEP

THEM OUT OF SHITTER DETAIL AND

PURE HELL MISERY, YOU DO THE

BEST JOB YOU CAN AT SUCKING UP

TO THE S-4 MARINES, BECAUSE

ULTIMATELY THEY DECIDE WHO

CLEANS THE SHITTER AND WHO

LOADS THE CHOW, WATER AND

AMMUNITION, WHO RAKES THE SAND

IN FRONT OF THE COLONEL'S G.P.

TENT, WHO PUTS THE ARMOR ALL

ON THE COLONEL'S HUMVEE TIRES.

THE S-4 KEEPS TWO LISTS.

ONE LIST IS OFFICIAL, WRITTEN

ON PAPER, AND IF YOU WERE TO

EXAMINE THE LIST, YOU'D HAVE

TO ADMIT THAT THE S-4 HANDS

OUT WORK PARTY DUTIES FAIRLY.

THE PROBLEM IS THE OTHER LIST

EXISTS IN THE COLLECTIVE BRAIN

TRUST OF THE S-4, AND THIS IS

THE REAL LIST.

IF YOUR SERGEANT IS NOT AN

ASS-KISSER, IF HE FOOLISHLY

BELIEVES HE EXISTS ON A PLAIN

ABOVE ASS-KISSING, YOU WILL

EXPERIENCE BAD LUCK.

YOUR SERGEANT CAN AFFORD NOT

TO KISS ASS BECAUSE HE WILL

NEVER BE ORDERED TO BURN THE

SHITTERS.

EVEN IF BACK IN THE DAYS WHEN

HE WAS A NON-RATE LIKE YOU, HE

HAD TO BURN THE SHITTERS, HE

HAS FORGOTTEN HIS HORRIBLE

HOURS.

OR YOUR SERGEANT MIGHT BE A

PERFECTLY CAPABLE ASS-KISSER

AND NOT ONLY CAPABLE BUT QUITE

HAPPY TO KISS.

HE MIGHT EVEN ENJOY IT.

HE MIGHT BE PROUD THAT HIS

PLATOON NEVER SUFFERS SHITTER

DETAIL, AND IF THIS IS THE

CASE, YOU ARE LUCKY AND A

BLESSED BASTARD.

IT'S MOST DESIRABLE TO SERVE

UNDER THE NUMBER ONE

ASS-KISSING SERGEANT.

BUT YOU MIGHT RECEIVE SHITTER

DETAIL BY PISSING OFF YOUR

SERGEANT SO THAT HE REQUESTS

THE DIRTY DUTY FOR YOUR

PLATOON, OR EVEN WORSE FOR YOU

PERSONALLY, BY NAME AND RANK,

AS THOUGH SHITTER DETAIL WERE

AN AWARD OR PROMOTION AND NOT

AN EXTREME INJURY TO YOUR

HEALTH, MORALE AND WELFARE.

SO SIEK FURTHERS THE

PUNISHMENT OF MY POOR

LEADERSHIP.

I RECEIVE ONE WEEK OF SOLO

SHITTER DETAIL BECAUSE OF

DETTMAN'S FAILURE ON FIRE

WATCH.

I'VE BEEN DOUBLE

POSSUM-FUCKED, FUCKED TWICE BY

THE SAME TWO-PECKERED POSSUM.

I TELL JOHNNY THAT I SHOULDN'T

BE ON SHITTER DETAIL.

IT'S A GREAT FAILURE OF

JUSTICE BUT HE JUST SMILES AND

SAYS "I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO."

THE BURNER MUST REPORT TO S-4

AND RETRIEVE THE TOOLS OF HIS

TRADE, A METAL FENCE POST,

WELDER'S GLOVES AND TONGS,

FIVE GALLONS OF DIESEL FUEL,

AND A BOX OF MATCHES.

THE MARINE HANDING OUT THESE

ITEMS ACTS AS THOUGH HE'S

SORRY YOU HAPPEN TO BE

STANDING IN FRONT OF HIM.

AS THOUGH HE KNOWS A MISTAKE

HAS OCCURRED, AND AS SOON AS

HE'S ABLE, HE'LL STRAIGHTEN

THINGS OUT.

HE WISELY EFFECTS THIS POSE SO

AS NOT TO BE STABBED THROUGH

THE HEART WITH A METAL FENCE

POST COVERED WITH BURNING

HUMAN WASTE.

THOUGH IT'S NOT AN OFFICIALLY

ENDORSED PRACTICE, MOST MEN ON

SHITTER DETAIL WILL SIGN THEIR

NAME OR AT LEAST THEIR UNIT

MONIKER SOMEWHERE ON THE

SHITTER, USUALLY WITH A GREASE

PENCIL BUT SOMETIMES WITH

SPRAY PAINT.

THESE ARE RATHER DELUXE

SHITTERS, NOT THE SIMPLE

BARREL AND HOLE VARIETY, SO

THE DEPOSITORIES ARE HOUSED

BEHIND THE HINGED DOOR.

I USE THE WELDER'S TONGS TO

REMOVE ALL THREE BARRELS AND I

POUR DIESEL OVER THE WASTE.

THE SMELL IS ATROCIOUS,

VOMITOUS.

I STIR THE BURNING SHIT AND I

WONDER IF SOMEWHERE IN KUWAIT

OR IRAQ MY PURE ENEMY MIGHT AT

THIS MOMENT BE STIRRING THE

BURNING SHIT OF HIS REGIMENT.

MAYBE HE'S ALLOWED A

SUBORDINATE TO FALL ASLEEP ON

DUTY OR OTHERWISE DISCREDIT OR

SHAME HIS UNIT AND THUS BEING

ASSIGNED SHITTER DETAIL.

I WONDER WHAT THE ARABIC TERM

FOR SHITTER DETAIL IS, IF THEY

USE DIESEL AND A FENCE POST,

THAT COULD ALSO BE USED TO

BUILD BURNING OBSTACLES AROUND

A MINEFIELD, DIRECTING THE

ENEMY, ME, TOWARD MY DEATH.

AND I'M SURE THE POOR MAN, MY

BROTHER IN ARMS AT THE MOMENT,

IS ALSO FEELING SICK TO HIS

STOMACH ABOUT TO VOMIT, AND I

VOMIT INTO THE BURNING WASTE

OF MY REGIMENT, THE SHIT BLACK

SMOKE COVERING MY FACE.

TWO MARINES I DON'T KNOW WALK

BY AND LAUGH AT ME AND I KNOW

THEY ARE POGUES, PROBABLY FROM

THE S-4, BECAUSE A FELLOW

GRUNT WOULD NEVER LAUGH LIKE

THAT.

I FINISH ALL OF THE OTHER

BARRELS WITHOUT INCIDENT.

MAYBE I NEEDED TO GET THAT

FIRST SHIPMENT OF BILE OUT OF

MY BODY AND NOW I CAN BURN

SHITTERS FOR THE REST OF MY

LIFE.

EVENTUALLY I PAID OFF THIS

P.S.C., KIND OF A WEIRD

FELLOW, $120 TO TAKE MY

SHITTER DETAIL FOR THE REST OF

THE WEEK.

A FEW DAYS LATER IN THE

BARRACKS IN THE REAR-REAR, I

HOLD MY LOCKED AND LOADED F-16

AGAINST DETTMAN'S LEFT TEMPLE.

MINOR SITS ON HIS RACK AND

PRETENDS NOT TO NOTICE.

I HAVEN'T PLANNED ON

THREATENING TO KILL DETTMAN.

I'VE BEEN CLEANING MY WEAPONS,

FIRST MY SNIPER RIFLE AND THEN

MY F-16.

DETTMAN AND I HAVE BEEN

COMPETING IN A WEAPONS

ASSEMBLY RACE WITH OUR F-16s,

SITTING CROSS-LEGGED.

I'VE BEATEN HIM 30 TIMES IN A

ROW BY 2 OR 3 SECOND EACH TRY

AND I HAVE BECOME TIRED OF THE

ROUTINE.

AND THE LAST TIME AFTER I

YELLED "DONE," I SIMPLY LOCK

AND LOAD A 30-ROUND MAGAZINE,

RUB THE MUZZLE AGAINST

DETTMAN'S TEMPLE AND ASK WHAT

WOULD YOU SAY IF I TOLD YOU I

WAS GOING TO KILL YOU FOR

FUCKING ME LIKE THAT?

I KNOW THIS IS CRAZY AND

RECKLESS, BUT I THINK DETTMAN

MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT.

AND I KNOW THAT, IF IN A

SECOND I SAY "FUCK IT" AND

PULL THE TRIGGER, I'LL BE ABLE

TO LIE MY WAY THROUGH AN

ACCIDENTAL DISCHARGE, AND THE

DETTMANS IN NORTH DAKOTA WILL

BE SAD, BUT I'LL BEAT THE FUCK

OUT OF SAUDI ARABIA AND

ENDLESS WAITING AND VARIOUS

OTHER FORMS OF MENTAL AND

PHYSICAL WASTE AND ALSO I'LL

FINALLY KNOW WHAT IT FEELS

LIKE TO KILL A MAN.

I SAY ELLIE BOWS, USING HIS

NICKNAME, I AM IN THE FIRING

POSITION KNOWN AS THE SITTING

POSITION.

AFTER THE PRONE POSITION, IT

IS CONSIDERED THE MOST STABLE

SHOOTING PLATFORM FOR THE M16.

IN OTHER WORDS, THE PLATFORM

MOST LIKELY TO ENABLE THE

MARINE TO EFFECTIVELY KILL HIS

TARGET.

HIS TARGET BEING A HUMAN,

GENERALLY AN ENEMY, BUT

SOMETIMES BY MISTAKE, A

FRIEND.

WE CALL THIS FRIENDLY FIRE OR

FRIENDLY FUCKING OR GETTING

FRIENDLY FUCKED.

SOUNDS LIKE FINGER FUCKED BUT

IT FEELS MUCH DIFFERENT, I'M

SURE.

DETTMAN APOLOGIZES FOR FALLING

ASLEEP ON WATCH.

HE THINKS THAT MY KILLING HIM

IS A SEVERE REACTION.

HE SAYS, "COME ON, SWOFF.

I'M SORRY.

I DON'T THINK YOU'LL PULL THE

TRIGGER.

YOU'RE JUST FUCKING WITH ME."

I SAY TO MYERS, "WHAT DO YOU

THINK, MYERS?

DO YOU THINK I'LL KILL YOUR

HOMEBOY FOR BOOT CAMP?"

"SURE, YOU'LL KILL HIM," MYERS

SAYS.

IT EXCITES ME TO KNOW THAT

MYERS BELIEVES I'LL KILL HIS

FRIEND.

"YOU TWO HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER

ALMOST FIVE MONTHS NOW.

YOU'RE SOME SALTY

MOTHERFUCKERS," I SAY.

THAT'S WHY ELLIE BOWS CAN FALL

ASLEEP ON FIRE WATCH, RIGHT?

SHE'S SO DAMN SALTY, SHE

DOESN'T HAVE TO DO WHAT HER

TEAM LEADER TELLS HER.

IS THAT RIGHT, MYERS?

MYERS, YOU DON'T SEE SHIT,

RIGHT?

I'M NOT SHEER.

THIS ISN'T EVEN MY ROOM, HE

SAYS.

ELLIE BOWS, I SAY, AFTER I PUT

THIS BULLET INTO YOUR HEAD I'M

GOING TO DRAG YOU OVER TO

KEEN'S ROOM AND LET HIM THROW

THAT MOP HEAD ON YOU, LET HIM

GO TO TOWN.

HOW'S THAT SOUND?

COME ON, SWOFF.

I'M SORRY.

I REALLY SCREWED UP.

I WAS JUST SITTING THERE BORED

AS FUCK, MAN, THINKING ABOUT

HOME.

I'M TIRED OF THIS SHIT.

YOU'RE TIRED?

YOU'VE BEEN HERE THREE WEEKS!

I WORKED THE MUZZLE AROUND HIS

EAR.

LET ME GET THAT WAX, SILLY

BOWS.

YOU DIDN'T LEARN TO CLEAN YOUR

EARS IN BOOT CAMP, DID YOU?

DON'T YOU KNOW THAT HYGIENE IS

THE SECOND MOST IMPORTANT

THING TO BULLETS ON THE

BATTLEFIELD?

THIS 5.5 SIX-ROUND WILL CLEAN

YOUR DIRTY EAR.

I DON'T KNOW WHO WAS MORE

NERVOUS, ME OR DETTMAN, BUT I

CONTINUED TO TALK, AND AS I

TALK I SOOTHE MYSELF AND COME

CLOSER TO BELIEVING THAT I CAN

FINISH THIS RECKLESS ACT.

I AM, AFTER ALL, A TRAINED

KILLER AND MY HEART HAS BEEN

HARDENED SO AS TO ALLOW DEATH

TO ENTER.

I DON'T KNOW DETTMAN OR I

DON'T LIKE DETTMAN.

HE'S A GODDAMN BOOT WHO IS

EATING CORN AND PIG AND

PRAYING AT THE FARMHOUSE TABLE

WHEN I DEPLOY TO SAUDI ARABIA.

I HAVE MORE IN COMMON WITH THE

IRAQI SOLDIERS AT THE KUWAITI

BORDER, MEN WHO DUG IN A FEW

DAYS BEFORE I LANDED IN

RIYADH, THAN I DO WITH

DETTMAN.

THE LOSS OF DETTMAN WON'T BE A

LOSS, BUT AN INCONVENIENCE, A

LITTLE BLOODY MESS.

I ALTERNATE MY MUZZLE BETWEEN

HIS EAR AND HIS PULSING

TEMPLE.

WE DISCUSS THE BALLISTIC

POSSIBILITIES, DEPENDING ON

THE BULLET'S POINTS OF ENTRY

AND THE TECHNICAL SPECIFICS OF

THE M16 RIFLE.

I TELL DETTMAN TO REPEAT AFTER

ME: THE M16 A-2 SERVICE RIFLE

IS AN AIR ASSISTED GAS RIFLE

THAT FIRES A 5.56-MILLIMETRE

BALL PROJECTILE.

MAXIMUM RANGE, 3,534 FEET.

MAXIMUM EFFECTIVE RANGE FOR

THE AREA OF THE TARGET, 800

METERS.

DETTMAN'S EARS ARE BLOOD RED

AND HE'S WEEPING, HIS EYES

TIGHT SHUT LIKE A CORN HUSK SO

THE TEARS MUST FORCE THEIR WAY

OUT ONE DROP AT A TIME.

RIFLE WEIGHT, 7.78 POUNDS.

THE BAYONET WEIGHS .60 POUNDS.

THE RIFLE CLEANING KIT AND

CLEANING LUBRICANT ARE STORED

IN THE BUTT STOCK OF THE

RIFLE.

DETTMAN IS SHAKING HIS HEAD NO

AS HE SPEAKS.

SNOT RUNS FROM HIS NOSE.

THIS IS MY RIFLE.

THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT BUT

THIS ONE IS MINE.

MY RIFLE IS MY BEST FRIEND.

WITHOUT ME, MY RIFLE IS

NOTHING.

WITHOUT MY RIFLE, I AM

NOTHING.

DETTMAN OPENS HIS EYES WIDE.

HE LOOKS AS THOUGH HE'S

EXPERIENCED A RELIGIOUS

EPIPHANY.

HE'S MOVING HIS LIPS BUT I

CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT HE'S

SAYING.

HE'S SPITTING AS HE TRIES TO

SPEAK.

HIS EARS HAVE TURNED AN EVEN

DEEPER RED AND HIS CHEEKS ARE

FLUSHED AND HE'S SOBBING

VIOLENTLY, HIS HEAD BOBBING

LIKE A BARK ON A ROUGH SEA.

I PUSHED THE MAGAZINE RELEASE

BUTTON AND MY MAGAZINE CLINKS

AGAINST THE DECK, AND I

DISCHARGE THE ROUND FROM THE

CHAMBER AND FORCE THE ROUND

INTO DETTMAN'S MOUTH, LIKE A

DENTIST FORCING A PAINFUL TOOL

THROUGH THE TIGHT LIPS OF A

CHILD.

IT STAYS THERE.

I THROW MY RIFLE ONTO THE DECK

AND THE SOUND OF THE HARD

PLASTIC HAND GUARDS AND THE

RIFLE METAL BOUNCING AGAINST

THE CONCRETE IS NOT UNLIKE THE

MAD CLATTER OF A NEW ORLEANS

FUNERAL MARCH RETURNING TO THE

CITY FROM THE GRAVE.

AFTER THE WRITER GIVES HERSELF

UP TO POVERTY AND MISERY AND

COMPLETES HER MANUSCRIPT, THE

NEXT BATTLE IS WHAT AN

OUTSIDER MIGHT DEFINE AS THE

EASIEST, HAVING YOUR BOOK

PUBLISHED.

I IMAGINE SOME OF YOU MIGHT

HAVE QUESTIONS ABOUT

PUBLISHING AND THE WRITER'S

LIFE AND I'LL OFFER A FEW

ANECDOTES AND SOME WORDS ABOUT

THE PROCESS, WHAT IT WAS LIKE

FOR ME.

CERTAINLY GETTING PUBLISHED IS

DIFFICULT, BUT IT'S ACTUALLY

NOTHING WHEN COMPARED TO THE

ACTUAL WORK OF WRITING THE

BOOK, THE COUNTLESS HOURS

SPENT WRITING THE BOOK, MAKING

THE ART.

I'LL SHARE SOME OF THE

PROCESS.

I KNOW THAT WHEN SEEN FROM THE

OUTSIDE, PUBLISHING WORLD

LOOKS BIG AND LABYRINTHIAN.

SOMEONE ONCE ASKED ME AT A

READING HOW LONG I'D KNOWN MY

EDITOR BEFORE HE BOUGHT MY

BOOK.

IF I'D STILL BEEN IN THE

MARINE CORPS AND STILL A

PSYCHOTIC, I MIGHT HAVE TAKEN

MY BOOK AND HIT HIM OVER HIS

HEAD WITH A COPY OF IT, BUT

I'M NO LONGER A PSYCHOTIC.

I SIMPLY TOLD HIM THAT THAT'S

NOT HOW IT REALLY WORKS IN

PUBLISHING, THAT SOMETIMES

THERE ARE THOSE STORIES, BUT

MINE WASN'T ONE OF THEM.

I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE A

STORY PUBLISHED IN A MAGAZINE

EARLY IN MY GRAD SCHOOL YEARS

AND SHORTLY AFTER THAT, AN

AGENT CONTACTED ME AND ASKED

TO REPRESENT MY WORK.

I INSTANTLY SENT HER EIGHT

SHORT STORIES AND 200 PAGES OF

A DEAD-IN-THE-WATER NOVEL.

SHE SUGGESTED I RESTART THE

NOVEL, BUT INSTEAD I INVENTED

A NEW CHARACTER, A JARHEAD

NAMED SWOFFORD.

THIS WAS THE NOVEL THAT HAD

SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE GULF

WAR.

I THOUGHT I'D BE VERY CLEVER,

VERY POST-MODERN, WHATEVER

THAT MEANT, AND THE AUTHOR AND

NARRATOR WOULD CONVERSE WITH

SWOFFORD.

IT WOULD BE A SWOFFORDFEST,

AND THE THING STUNK.

IT WAS HORRIBLE, I ASSURE YOU.

AND EGO WAS THE DISEASE.

EGO WAS THE DISEASE CAUSING MY

PROSE TO ROT.

BUT I FINALLY DISCOVERED MY

AUTOBIOGRAPHY, HIDDEN FOR MANY

YEARS UNDER FEAR AND EGO.

I STRIPPED THE MYTHICAL MARINE

SWOFFORD BARE AND I PLACED HIM

ON A PAGE AND REALIZED THAT

HIS GREATEST ALLY WAS NOT EGO

BUT HISTORY.

HORRIBLE THINGS HAD HAPPENED,

AND HORRIBLE THINGS HAD

HAPPENED AND I HAD TAKEN PART,

AND I WAS MARKED FOR LIFE BY

THAT FIGHTING, PILLAGING AND

BURNING.

AND NOW I HAD TO RECREATE

THOSE EVENTS, TURN THEM INTO

NARRATIVE ART.

AND I BECAME A RELUCTANT

MEMOIRIST AND YOU ARE NOW

READING THE RESULT.

I WAS A WRITER DEDICATED TO

THE ART OF FICTION, WITH

NOTHING BUT TRUE EVENTS ON MY

HANDS.

I WROTE 60 PAGES IN A MONTH.

AND THAT WAS JUST BEFORE 9/11

OCCURRED.

AND SO AFTER THAT I TOLD

JARHEAD IN WHAT MANY PEOPLE

WILL CALL THE CHANGED WORLD, A

WORLD THAT SUDDENLY BECAME

MILITARIZED AND SUDDENLY WAR

WAS EVERYWHERE AT ONCE.

AFTER THE STRUGGLE OF WRITING

THE BOOK, THE HARDEST PART IS

ACTUALLY WAITING, BECAUSE

THERE'S A LONG PERIOD OF TIME

BETWEEN TURNING IN A

MANUSCRIPT AND PUBLICATION.

AND ABOUT EXACTLY THIS TIME

LAST YEAR, I RECEIVED THE

FIRST COPY OF MY BOOK, AND I

CALLED MY EDITOR TO TELL HIM

THANKS FOR SENDING IT, AND HE

SMILED THROUGH THE PHONE LINES

AND HE SAID TO ME, "YOU HAVE

MADE THIS AND EARNED IT AND NO

ONE CAN EVER TAKE IT AWAY FROM

YOU, NO MATTER WHAT IS SAID OR

WRITTEN IN THE FUTURE."

TODAY I'M LUCKY TO BE STANDING

IN FRONT OF A ROOM OF READERS.

EVERY WRITER'S DREAM.

SOME OF YOU MAY SAY AND WRITE

THINGS THAT WILL PLEASE ME AND

SOME OF YOU MAY NOT.

YOU, TOO, WILL BE AUTHORS,

AUTHORS OF IDEAS, PEDDLERS OF

CRITICISM, TALKERS OF PRAISE

PERHAPS.

AND THIS EXCHANGE IS WHAT

PUBLISHING IS ABOUT IN THE

END, THE INTERACTION, THE

CLASHING, THE DANCING, THE

MEAN DEBAUCHERY OF TWO MINDS

AT WORK.

BECAUSE BEFORE IT IS ANYTHING

ELSE, A BOOK IS A BRAIN ON THE

PAGE.

AND THE READER'S TASK AND THE

READER'S PLEASURE IS PEELING

BACK THESE LAYERS OF THE

STRANGER'S BRAIN AND GETTING

TO KNOW.

IN A FEW DAYS, I'LL LEAVE

ROCHESTER, BUT MY BOOK WILL

STILL BE HERE WITH YOU.

SOME OF YOU WILL BE ON YOUR

DESKS.

SOME OF YOU IT WILL BE CRAMMED

INTO BACKPACKS.

OTHERS OF YOU MAY FORGET IT

SOMEWHERE.

I LEFT A BOOK IN A TAXI THE

OTHER NIGHT IN NEW YORK.

I'M REALLY SAD.

I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO

READING THE BOOK.

NOW I HAVE TO BUY ANOTHER

COPY.

YOU MIGHT BE WORKING ON AN

ESSAY THIS WEEKEND, WRITING MY

NAME AND CURSING IT.

PLEASE KNOW THAT I'LL BE IN

OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA, WHERE IT

WILL BE ABOUT 70 DEGREES

WARMER.

(Laughter)

>> I'LL OPEN IT UP TO QUESTIONS

NOW.

(Applause)

>> WE HAVE TWO MICS, ONE ON

THIS SIDE AND IF SOMEBODY

COULD HELP ON THE OTHER SIDE.

THANKS, GARY.

JUST RAISE YOUR HAND AND WE'LL

BRING THE MIC UP TO YOU.

WHATEVER QUESTIONS YOU HAVE

FOR TONY WOULD BE GREAT.

>> HI, TONY.

IN YOUR BOOK, YOU PAINTED A

PICTURE OF VERY UNHAPPY

SOLDIERS, INCLUDING YOURSELF

GOING TO COMBAT DUTY ALMOST AS

IF THEY WERE FORCED INTO IT.

OF COURSE YOUR EXPERIENCE

WHILE IN ACTS OF COMBAT WAS

VERY UNPLEASANT.

I'M NOT SAYING IT WOULD BE A

PLEASANT EXPERIENCE, BUT WERE

THERE ANY SOLDIERS WHO WERE

EXCITED ABOUT WHAT THEY WERE

DOING AND CAME BACK WITH GOOD

THINGS TO SAY ABOUT HOW THEY

SERVED THE COUNTRY WELL, AND

WHAT WAS YOUR OWN ATTITUDE

FROM THE VERY BEGINNING ABOUT

GOING TO WAR THAT LED TO YOUR

BAD EXPERIENCES?

>> IT'S NOT ONLY AN UNHAPPY

PICTURE I THINK.

IT'S-- YOU KNOW, THERE ARE

SOME MOMENTS THAT ARE SPECIAL

FOR ME AND MY MATES.

I THINK THAT MY RELUCTANCE TO

BE A COMBATANT HAD STARTED

EARLY ON, CERTAINLY AFFECTED

MY MOVEMENT INTO COMBAT, BUT

I'M ALSO QUITE CERTAIN THAT

THAT WASN'T ABNORMAL.

QUITE HONESTLY, THE GUYS WHO

WERE PRETTY EXCITED ABOUT

GOING INTO COMBAT AND KILLING

PEOPLE ARE REALLY SCARY, AND

THEY'RE THE PEOPLE, YOU KNOW,

WHO END UP MAKING MISTAKES AND

GETTING OTHERS KILLED.

AND IN FACT I MOVE BETWEEN

THOSE DIFFERENT REALMS,

BETWEEN WANTING TO BE A

KILLER, WANTING TO BE A

SAVAGE, WANTING TO GO KILL FOR

MY COUNTRY AND, YOU KNOW,

BURNING A BARREL OF SHIT AND

THINKING ABOUT THE IRAQI

SOLDIER DOING THE SAME SAD

DUTY, THE GUY THAT I MIGHT

VERY SHORTLY BE IN COMBAT

WITH.

AND, YEAH, I MEAN PEOPLE WHO--

AT THE SAME TIME, I UNDERSTAND

THAT, BECAUSE OF THE

EXHILARATION OF COMBAT,

BECAUSE OF THE EXCITEMENT, THE

FEAR AND THE INSANITY, SOME

PEOPLE ARE VERY ATTACHED TO

THEIR TIME IN COMBAT AND

CONSIDER IT THEIR HIGH

MOMENTS, SOME OF THEIR HIGH

MOMENTS IN THE MARINE CORPS,

IN THE MILITARY, AT WAR, THEY

WERE LIVING AT THEIR BEST.

SOME DO FEEL THAT WAY.

>> THANKS.

>> HI.

>> I HAVE TWO QUESTIONS.

THE MILITARY LIFE, ANY

DIFFERENT THAN THE MILITARY

LIFE, NOW OR-- I DON'T KNOW

HOW TO SAY IT, BUT I GUESS I'M

TRYING TO SAY IS HOW DIFFERENT

IS YOUR LIFE NOW SINCE YOU'VE

LEFT THE MILITARY?

>> OKAY.

>> THAN IT WOULD BE IF YOU HAD

NEVER ENTERED THE MILITARY AT

ALL?

>> SO THAT'S TWO PARTS OF THE

QUESTION?

OKAY.

WELL, MY LIFE IS RADICALLY

DIFFERENT AS I SAID TO YOU

EARLIER, 50 POUNDS HEAVIER

THAN I SHOULD BE IN ORDER TO

GO FIGHT FOR THE MARINE CORPS.

THAT'S A LOT FUNNIER.

LAUGH MORE.

(Laughter)

BUT MY LIFE IS RADICALLY

DIFFERENT.

YOU KNOW, I'M A COLLEGE

PROFESSOR.

I'M A WRITER.

I STARTED WRITING "JARHEAD"

YOU KNOW PARTLY BECAUSE I

DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THE

20-YEAR-OLD WHO I MENTIONED

EARLIER.

I WAS 30.

HE WAS 20.

I WAS LIVING IN IOWA CITY, HAD

JUST FINISHED GRADUATE SCHOOL,

AND I WAS A WRITER, AND HE HAD

A RUCKSACK ON HIS BACK AND WAS

LIVING A PRETTY MISERABLE LIFE

AND WAS SOMETIMES EXCITED

ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF GOING

AND KILLING PEOPLE AND

SOMETIMES HORRIFIED BY IT, BUT

NO MATTER WHAT, VERY ADEPT AT

THE SKILLS THAT HE NEEDED TO

GO OFF AND KILL.

SO, YEAH, MY LIFE IS RADICALLY

DIFFERENT.

HOW WOULD MY LIFE HAVE BEEN

DIFFERENT HAD I NOT JOINED THE

MARINE CORPS?

I'M NOT SURE.

I WOULD HAVE BECOME A WRITER,

YOU KNOW, BUT RATHER THAN A

BOOK ABOUT WAR, MY FIRST BOOK

MIGHT HAVE BEEN A NOVEL ABOUT,

I DON'T KNOW, LOVERS LIVING IN

MANHATTAN OR SOMETHING.

I'M IN THE REALLY-- YOU KNOW,

SO IT'S HARD FOR ME TO ANSWER

THAT SORT OF HYPOTHETICAL

QUESTION.

BUT I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T HAVE

WRITTEN THIS BOOK.

>> ONE UP HERE.

>> THANK YOU.

>> HI.

IN "JARHEAD," YOU COMMENT THAT

TO BE A TRUE MARINE, YOU HAVE

TO KILL.

BUT THEN LATER ON YOU SAY THAT

YOU WERE SAD BY NOT KILLING.

IT'S AS IF YOU ALMOST

CONTRADICT YOURSELF THERE.

CAN YOU JUST CLARIFY MORE?

>> OH, SURE.

I DON'T THINK IT'S A

CONTRADICTION.

I OFFER A DEFINITION THAT'S

LARGELY AVAILABLE AND LARGELY

BELIEVED THROUGHOUT THE MARINE

CORPS, AND THE FACT IS I

DIDN'T KILL.

SO FOR MANY YEARS, I DEALT

WITH THAT SOMETIMES, YOU KNOW,

FEELING ASHAMED OF THAT FACT,

SOMETIMES WANTING TO GO TO

COMBAT AGAIN, SOMETIMES

WISHING, EVEN FANTASIZING

ABOUT HAVING KILLED PEOPLE,

AND THAT BEING PART OF THE

PSYCHOSIS I MENTIONED EARLIER.

BUT EVENTUALLY, YOU KNOW,

PARTLY THROUGH THE COMPOSITION

OF THIS BOOK, I MOVED TO THE

PLACE WHERE I COULD RECOGNIZE,

YOU KNOW, THAT I WAS

ESSENTIALLY HAPPIER, THAT I

WAS A BETTER PERSON FOR HAVING

NOT KILL.

AND I DON'T THINK THAT THOSE

ARE CONTRADICTORY STATEMENTS.

THEY'RE JUST DIFFERENT VIEWS.

>> YEAH.

OKAY.

THAT'S GOOD.

>> THE SUCCESS OF THE WAR IN

IRAQ PRESENTLY AFFECTED

AMERICAN POLITICS NOW SINCE

THE GULF WAR?

>> WELL, I THINK WHAT'S GOING

ON IN IRAQ RIGHT NOW IS, YOU

KNOW, A CONTINUATION OF THE

FIRST GULF WAR REALLY.

WE MUST REMEMBER THAT WE WERE,

ON A DAILY BASIS, BOMBING IN

IRAQ, YOU KNOW, FROM THE DAY

THAT THE GULF WAR ENDED TO

MARCH 19th OF THIS PAST YEAR,

WHEN WE STARTED-- WHEN WE WERE

AT COMBAT AGAIN.

A CONTINUATION OF A CERTAIN

WORLD VIEW AND AN AMERICAN USE

OF POWER IS WHAT WE'RE SEEING

NOW.

I'M NOT SURE IF I'VE ANSWERED

YOUR QUESTION.

>> TONY, I WANTED TO ASK YOU A

QUESTION ABOUT YOUR CONTINUING

DEBATE-- I'M SORRY.

>> MY RELATIONSHIP?

WELL, MY RELATIONSHIP IS, YOU

KNOW, PRETTY UNCOMFORTABLE

ONE.

LAST TIME I WAS A SOLDIER WHO

WAS GIVEN ORDERS THAT I HAD TO

FOLLOW, AND THIS TIME I'M A

CITIZEN AND I'M PART OF THE

CITIZENRY, PART OF THE PUBLIC

THAT IS ASKING OTHERS TO GO

OFF, IN MY NAME ESSENTIALLY,

AND DO THESE THINGS, THAT I

THINK ARE VERY PRECARIOUS FOR

AMERICAN POWER AND REALLY FOR

DEMOCRACY.

YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S VERY

DANGEROUS AND WE'RE SEEING THE

RESULT OF, YOU KNOW, RIGHT NOW

DAILY IN IRAQ WE'RE SEEING THE

RESULT OF NOT LISTENING TO THE

WORLD BODY AND GOING IN ALONE

LAST YEAR.

YES, SIR?

>> YEAH.

I WANTED TO PURSUE THE

QUESTION THAT YOU RAISED IN

THE BEGINNING ABOUT BATTLING

WITH YOUR OWN BIOGRAPHY AND

PSYCHOSIS.

I STARTED MAKING A LIST OF THE

TONY SWOFFORD IN THIS BOOK,

HIS PSYCHOLOGICAL

CHARACTERISTICS AND MATCHING

IT UP AGAINST A KIND OF LIST

OF MENTAL ILLNESSES

(Chuckling)

AND IT'S QUITE A LONG LIST.

(Laughter)

>> IS THIS GOING TO COST ME 90

BUCKS AN HOUR?

>> YEAH, IT WILL.

(Laughter)

BUT WHAT I'M REALLY ASKING YOU

IS, RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING,

THERE'S A KIND OF DISCONNECT

BETWEEN THE TONY SWOFFORD WHO

CAME TO OUR CAMPUS AND WHO

APPEARS TO US TONIGHT WHO'S A

VERY RATIONAL, SANE, AMUSING,

INTERESTING, INTELLIGENT

PERSON.

THE 90 BUCKS IS DUE NOW.

AND THE GUY WHO SHOWS UP IN

THIS BOOK, WHO I THINK IS, LET

ME SEE, HOMICIDAL,

KLEPTOMANIAC, PARANOID,

SCHIZOPHRENIC, MISOGYNIST,

ANTISOCIAL, INFANTILE SEXUAL

OBSESSIONS.

HAVE I MISSED ANY?

(Laughter)

>> I ACTUALLY CAME--

>> CAN I GET A COPY OF THIS?

>> I CAME UP WITH 13.

I GUESS WHAT I'M ASKING YOU IS

YOU'RE AN ARTIST AND WE EXPECT

ARTISTS TO ENGAGE IN A CERTAIN

AMOUNT OF PUFFING TO TRY TO

GET THE MATERIAL SO THAT IT

REALLY IS INTERESTING TO THE

READER.

BUT I'M WONDERING IF SOME OF

THIS STRUGGLE-- I MEAN, A KID

AT THE AGE OF 19 WHO HAS THIS

MUCH PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEMS

DOESN'T LOSE IT.

ARE YOU STILL STRUGGLING WITH

THESE ISSUES?

I MEAN, LIKE THERE'S EXTREME

DEPRESSION IN THIS BOOK.

IS THIS STILL AN ISSUE FOR YOU

OR-- OR WAS THE STORY MADE UP?

>> NO.

THERE'S NOTHING MADE UP HERE.

I'M-- YEAH, YOU KNOW, I MEAN,

I STRUGGLE LIVING JUST LIKE

EVERYONE ELSE.

I PUT THAT STRUGGLE INTO MY

HEART, I THINK IS MY FINAL

ANSWER.

I MEAN, THAT'S HOW I ATTEMPT

TO STAY SANE.

>> SO YOU'RE YOUR OWN

PSYCHIATRIST?

>> I DON'T KNOW IF I'M MY OWN

PSYCHIATRIST, BUT I AM AN

ARTIST AND I AM A WRITER, AND

I, YOU KNOW, EVERY DAY, AS I

SAID EARLIER, I DO BATTLE ON

THE PAGE, AND YOUR RATHER

CONCISE LIST OF CERTAIN

PROBLEMS THAT THIS TONY

SWOFFORD HAD MAY OR MAY NOT

CROP UP WITH ME.

BUT YEAH, I MEAN, THAT'S,

YEAH, THAT'S HOW I DEAL WITH

IT, WITH MY ART.

>> DO YOU THINK WITH ALL THE

WRITING THAT YOU'VE DONE THAT

YOU LIKE YOURSELF BETTER NOW

THAN YOU DID--

>> YEAH, I MEAN EARLIER I SAID

I DON'T LIKE THIS GUY.

I MEAN HE'S A SAVAGE.

I DON'T WANT TO RUN INTO HIM

OUTSIDE.

I DON'T WANT TO SEE HIM ON THE

STREET.

I DON'T WANT TO SPEND TIME

AROUND HIM.

I WROTE THE BOOK IN ORDER TO

UNDERSTAND HIM, TO KNOW WHO HE

WAS AND WHERE HE CAME FROM.

I UNDERSTAND HIM I FORGIVE

HIM.

I UNDERSTAND WHAT MOVED HIM

INTO THAT SPACE, WHAT MADE HIM

VIOLENT, SAVAGE.

>> SO THAT'S WHAT YOU MEANT BY

FORGIVING, THAT THE WRITER

FORGIVES THE CHARACTER?

>> THE PRIOR SELF, YES.

>> THANKS FOR LETTING ME BE

INTRUSIVE.

>> QUESTIONS OVER HERE.

>> I READ THE BOOK.

>> I HAVE A QUESTION OVER

HERE.

>> I'D JUST LIKE TO INTERJECT

THAT TONY IS STAYING WITH ME

AND MY WIFE AUDREY FOR THE

NEXT TWO OR THREE DAYS AND

WE'RE NOT WORRIED ABOUT

ANYTHING.

(Laughter)

>> I HAVE A QUESTION OVER

HERE.

>> GARY, YOU WANT TO GET THE

MIC OVER?

>> IN CLASS, WE HAVE BEEN

TALKING ABOUT THE SYMBOLS IN

THE BOOK, AND THE FISHTAIL.

SOMETHING'S ON THE ARM.

>> FISH SCALES ON THE ARM.

>> YEAH, THE FISH SCALES ON

THE ARM.

FOR EXAMPLE, ARE YOU REFERRING

TO SOMETHING IN YOUR PAST WHEN

YOU LOOK AT THE WOMEN AND THE

MEN AND-- SO WHAT EXACTLY DID

THE FISH SCALES REPRESENT?

WHAT'S THE SYMBOLISM OF THAT?

>> I MEAN, I'M NOT VERY GOOD

AT SYMBOLISM, I HAVE TO ADMIT.

I MEAN, IN THE BOOK, IT WAS AN

ENTRY INTO A MEMORY AS IT WAS

DURING THE EVENT.

IT WAS THAT MOVEMENT INTO THE

MEMORY, AND YOU KNOW IF I

PULLED OUT MY ENCYCLOPEDIA OF

SYMBOLS, I CAN PROBABLY KNOW

WHAT FISH SCALES ARE SUPPOSED

TO MEAN.

YEAH, I CAN'T-- I CAN'T ASSIGN

THEM ANY KIND OF SYMBOLIC

WEIGHT.

I GOT AN "F" ON SYMBOLS IN

FRESHMAN COMPOSITION.

NO, I MEAN THE WRITER MAKES--

I MEAN THE WRITER SYMBOLS,

SOMETHING SYMBOLIC.

YOU KNOW, READERS, READERS

TURN SOMETHING INTO A SYMBOL.

FOR THE WRITER, IT'S AN IMAGE

AND THE WRITER IS USING IT,

YOU KNOW, FOR ANY NUMBER OF

REASONS, TO FURTHER NARRATIVE,

TO ENHANCE CHARACTER, FOR PLOT

MOVEMENT, WHAT HAVE YOU.

AND CERTAINLY THE SYMBOLIC

IMPORTANCE IS ATTACHED TO

THOSE THINGS, BUT IF A WRITER

SITS DOWN AND SAYS, OKAY, I

NEED TO USE LIKE THESE SEVEN

SYMBOLS, THE WRITER IS GOING

TO FAIL.

I MEAN THE WRITER MAY USE

THOSE SEVEN SYMBOLS, BUT THE

PIECE OF WORK WILL PROBABLY BE

A FAILURE.

>> OVER HERE, TONY.

WHAT HAVE OTHER MARINES SAID

TO YOU ABOUT THIS BOOK?

>> WELL, THIS EVENING, THERE'S

A GENTLEMAN IN THE AUDIENCE

WHOSE SON IS A LANCE CORPORAL

IN THE MARINE CORPS, AND HIS

SON BOUGHT HIM-- BOUGHT THE

GENTLEMAN IN THE AUDIENCE A

COPY OF MY BOOK, THE YOUNG

LAD'S CORPORAL BOUGHT HIS

GIRLFRIEND A COPY OF THE BOOK

AND SAID, HEY, IF YOU WANT TO

KNOW THE MARINE CORPS, BUY

THIS BOOK.

I HEAR A LOT OF THAT.

THERE ARE GUYS WHO THINK I

SOLD OFF THE MARINE CORPS,

THAT I'VE BEEN UNFAITHFUL,

THAT, YOU KNOW, I'M NOT A TRUE

MARINE BECAUSE OF THAT, AND

THERE ARE OTHER ATTACKS AND,

YOU KNOW, TO THOSE PEOPLE, I

TELL THEM TO WRITE THEIR OWN

BOOK.

>> GOOD EVENING, TONY.

>> GOOD EVENING.

I JUST RUINED THIS $50,000

LECTERN.

>> A QUESTION HERE.

>> I HAVE A QUESTION RIGHT

HERE.

>> HI.

I WAS WONDERING, LIKE, YOUR

BOOK DEPICTS THE TIME YOU'RE

DESCRIBING ALL THE WILL

UNFAITHFUL, INCLUDING ALL YOUR

FRIENDS, THEIR WIVES AND THEIR

GIRLFRIENDS.

IT SEEMS THAT THERE ARE NO

FAITHFUL WOMEN IN THE WORLD AT

THAT TIME.

(Laughter)

>> WELL, NO.

THE WIVES OF MY FRIENDS ARE

FAITHFUL.

MY FRIENDS IN MY PLATOON.

I MEAN INFIDELITY IS A SERIOUS

PROBLEM IN THE MILITARY ON

BOTH SIDES, THE PEOPLE WHO ARE

DEPLOYED AND THE PEOPLE WHO

ARE AT HOME.

I HAVE A GOOD FRIEND WHO WROTE

A PIECE ON THE HORRIBLE,

HORRIBLE MURDERS AT FORT BRAGG

LAST YEAR WHEN GUYS RETURNED

FROM AFGHANISTAN.

AND VERY UNFORTUNATELY IN

EVERY ONE OF THOSE CASES,

INFIDELITY WAS A FACTOR.

THAT'S NOT-- I'M NOT FORGIVING

THOSE CRIMES.

I'M SAYING, YOU KNOW, LET'S BE

AWARE-- YOU KNOW, LET'S BE

ADULT ABOUT IT.

INFIDELITY IS A PROBLEM IN THE

WORLD IN GENERAL, AND WHEN

PEOPLE ARE SEPARATED FOR LONG

AMOUNTS OF TIME, INFIDELITY

BECOMES A PROBLEM.

AND WHEN YOU'RE 18 YEARS OLD,

19, 20 YEARS OLD AND YOU'RE

OFF AND YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT

A WAR AND YOU'RE MAYBE GOING

TO GET YOUR ASS BLOWN OFF AND

YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS BACK HOME,

ONE OF THE REASONS THAT YOU

LOVE HER AND THAT YOU WANT HER

TO BE FAITHFUL IS BECAUSE

SHE'S THAT LINK BACK TO THE

WORLD.

SHE'S THAT THING THAT KEEPS

YOU HUMAN AND SOFT.

WHEN YOU OPEN THE LETTER FROM

HER, YOU CAN BE SOFT AGAIN AND

REALIZE THAT YOU'RE LOVED AND,

YOU KNOW, YOU CAN TALK ABOUT

TEDDY BEARS OR HEARTS OR, YOU

KNOW, WHATEVER IT IS YOU TALK

ABOUT.

LIKE YOU CAN'T TALK ABOUT

TEDDY BEARS WITH YOUR BUDDY,

RIGHT, TRAINING TO KILL WITH

YOU.

(Laughter)

>> I THINK THE OTHER PART IS

THAT YOU ACKNOWLEDGE ALL THE

FEMALES IN YOUR LIFE.

I MEAN LIKE ONCE IN YOUR BOOK

YOU MENTION ABOUT DOG TAGS,

WHICH HAVE, LIKE, SOME

IMPORTANCE TO YOU, AND YOU

MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE PEOPLE

THAT HAVE RELEVANCE TO YOU,

LIKE DOG TAGS WITH ALL OF THEM

AND YOU ACKNOWLEDGE THE

PROSTITUTES' PART IN YOUR

LIFE.

I THINK THAT'S REALLY GOOD.

>> WHO IS NEXT?

>> 254 PAGES, THE CLASS WAS

TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING FROM

PAGE 254.

INDOLENCE AND FEAR OF

COWARDICE MAYBE, DRIVES ME

SOMETHING.

SO DON'T YOU FEEL A LITTLE BIT

DEPRESSED AFTER WRITING THIS

BOOK, OR ARE YOU FEELING

COMPLETELY THAT YOU'RE BACK

TOGETHER AFTER WRITING THIS

BOOK?

ARE YOU FEELING BETTER?

>> NO, I'M NOT NECESSARILY

FEELING BETTER.

YOU KNOW, THAT SECTION OF THE

BOOK IS, IN SOME WAYS, IT'S AN

APOLOGY TO THE READER.

I'M TELLING YOU THAT I'VE DONE

MY BEST JOB AT REMAKING THIS

WAR, THAT I'VE MADE THE BEST

PIECE OF ART THAT I POSSIBLY

COULD AT THIS MOMENT.

AND PARTLY I DESPAIR OVER NOT

KNOWING WHETHER OR NOT I'VE

ACHIEVED THAT.

I ALSO-- IT'S AN APOLOGY FOR

THRUSTING THIS NASTY, BRUTAL

WORLD INTO YOUR LIFE.

AND, YOU KNOW, PART OF THAT

DESPAIR IS AS WELL THE

WRITER'S DESPAIR, AND THE

GENTLEMAN EARLIER LISTED WHAT

MAY BE A FEW OF MY AILMENTS.

AND THAT'S PART OF THAT

DESPAIR.

>> I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU'VE

RECENTLY SOLD THE FILM RIGHTS

TO YOUR BOOK.

>> WHERE ARE YOU?

>> I HAVE A FOLLOW-UP

QUESTION.

>> OKAY.

>> I JUST HAVE ONE OTHER

QUESTION I WANTED TO ASK REAL

QUICK, I'M SORRY.

WHEN YOU WERE IN THE LINE, IN

THE-- I'M SORRY.

JUST A SECOND.

>> WHAT PAGE?

>> THE CHARACTER-- OH,

CIVILIAN, WHEN YOU WERE A

CIVILIAN AND YOU WERE LIKE

CLAPPING.

DID YOU FEEL A LITTLE BIT SICK

HOW EVERYONE WAS LIKE

APPLAUDING FOR YOU?

>> YEAH.

THAT HERO'S WELCOME MADE ME--

>> AND THEN LATER, DID YOU

FEEL AGAIN HOW PEOPLE JUST

WERE APPLAUDING FOR YOU DID

YOU LIKE ACCEPT IT?

YOU KNOW, THE ACCOMMODATIONS?

>> NO.

I MEAN, THE HERO'S WELCOME, IF

YOU WILL, MADE ME VERY

UNCOMFORTABLE, AND, YOU KNOW,

THE HERO'S WELCOME IS THERE

REALLY NOT FOR THE SOLDIERS OR

THE MARINES.

IT OCCURS FOR THE CIVILIANS.

IT OCCURS FOR THE PEOPLE WHO

HAVE ASKED THEM TO GO OFF AND

DO THESE NASTY, BRUTAL THINGS

AND CLAPPING ON THE SIDES OF

THE ROAD IS HELPFUL TO THEM

BUT NOT TO-- NOT NECESSARILY

TO THE GUYS ON THE GROUND.

IN THE END, YOU KNOW, LONG

TERM, A FEW-- YOU KNOW, A

PARADE, SOME THANKS, A WELCOME

IS LONG TERM THE VALUE'S

MINIMAL, AND LONG TERM IS

REALLY WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT

TO SAY PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALTH.

>> CAN YOU PLEASE IDENTIFY

WHERE YOU ARE WHEN WE GET A

MIC UP TO YOU?

>> SOMEONE WAS ASKING A

QUESTION OVER HERE AND THEN HE

GOT--

>> HI.

MY QUESTION IS YOU SAY WITHIN

THE BOOK THAT ALL FILMS ABOUT

WAR ARE PRO-WAR NO MATTER WHAT

THE STANCE, AND YOUR BOOK IS

PREDOMINANTLY ANTIWAR, AT

LEAST I FEEL.

SO I WONDER WHY SELL THE FILM

RIGHTS AND WHAT YOU FEEL-- OR

IF YOU FEEL THAT THE FILM OF

YOUR BOOK WILL BE PRO WAR OR

ANTIWAR.

>> SURE.

WHY SELL THE FILM RIGHTS?

BECAUSE I'M INTERESTED IN

SEEING WHAT HAPPENS AND

HOLLYWOOD PAYS A LOT MORE

MONEY THAN MANHATTAN

PUBLISHING DOES.

THOUGH I DON'T REALLY FEEL

THAT WAY.

I WAS REALLY CAREFUL ABOUT WHO

I ALLOWED TO PURCHASE THE

RIGHTS.

THERE WERE VARIOUS ENTITIES

INTERESTED, AND THERE WERE A

FEW OF THEM WHO I THOUGHT WERE

GOING TO DO A RATHER POOR JOB

WITH IT, AND I WASN'T

INTERESTED IN THEM BEING

ATTACHED.

THE GUY WHO'S WRITING THE

SCREENPLAY WAS A MARINE IN

VIETNAM, WAS THE FIRST

MILITARY-- AMERICAN MILITARY

MEMBER TO VISIT VIETNAM IN THE

'80s WHEN VETERANS WERE

RETURNING, REALLY SMART GUY

WHO'S DONE SOME IMPORTANT WORK

WITH VETERANS AND HIS WORK IS

AS WELL, YOU KNOW, FALLS INTO

THE ANTIWAR.

I THINK "JARHEAD" IS MORE

ABOUT WAR THAN IT'S ANTIWAR,

BUT, YOU KNOW, IT'S A

NARRATIVE ACCOUNT, AND AS I

SAY IN THE END, YOU KNOW,

THOSE WHO GO TO WAR RETURN IN

ORDER TO TELL THE BAD NEWS.

WHAT I HOPE IS THAT WHAT

TRANSFERS FROM THE NARRATIVE,

FROM THE BOOK TO THE SCREEN,

OFFERS SOME OF THAT BAD NEWS

AND IT STAYS AS MUCH AS

POSSIBLE CLOSE TO MY STORY.

>> SOMEONE HERE, TONY.

>> MY QUESTION HAS TO DO WITH

THE PORTION OF THE BOOK WHERE

YOU WITNESS THE DESECRATION OF

THE BODIES WHILE ON

DEPLOYMENT, AND TO ME IT WAS

SORT OF SENSATIONALIZED AND I

WAS WONDERING HOW YOU COULD

OFFER, OH, ANYTHING BUT A JAIL

TERM FOR SOMEONE WHO ALLOWS A

BODY FALLEN IN WAR TO BE

DESECRATED.

>> WELL, I'LL SAY THAT IT'S

NOT SENSATIONALIZED.

WHEN I FINISHED THIS BOOK, I

HADN'T SPOKEN TO ANYONE I

SERVED WITH FOR A LONG TIME.

AND THAT WAS ONE OF THE SCENES

THAT I WAS CONCERNED WITH,

MAKING SURE THAT I'D RENDERED

IT HONESTLY AND WHAT I HAD

RENDERED HERE WAS TRUE TO WHAT

OCCURRED.

SO I TRACKED DOWN THIS FELLOW

WHO'S IN THE BOOK NAMED

ATTICUS.

HE LIVES ON A LAKE IN SUPERIOR

WISCONSIN.

AND I SAID, HEY, MAN, YOU

KNOW, WE CAUGHT UP AND I SAID,

YOU KNOW, I'VE WRITTEN THIS

BOOK.

IT'S COMING OUT SHORTLY.

A COUPLE THINGS I WANT TO RUN

BY YOU.

ONE OF THEM IS, YOU KNOW, WHEN

CROCKET, WHO WAS DESECRATING

THE CORPSES.

AND ATTICUS WENT ON AND TOLD

THE STORY.

HE SAID OH, YEAH, I TOLD THAT

AT THE BAR ALL THE TIME.

AND HE WENT ON AND TOLD THE

STORY IN KIND OF MORE

THRILLING AND GRAPHIC DETAIL,

YOU KNOW, THAN I DO.

AND I THOUGHT, WELL, SHIT, I

SHOULD HAVE HAD ATTICUS WRITE

THAT.

NO, I MEAN IT'S A CRIME.

IT'S A CRIME, AND CERTAINLY,

YOU KNOW, JAIL SENTENCES

SHOULD HAVE BEEN HANDED DOWN.

BUT THIS IS NOT-- DESECRATING

CORPSES IS NOTHING NEW.

I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT IT'S

HAPPENED IN EVERY WAR THAT'S

EVER BEEN FOUGHT.

YOU KNOW, THAT'S WHAT

CANNIBALISM IS ABOUT.

IT'S ABOUT MAKING YOUR ENEMY

THINK YOU'RE SOME REALLY CRAZY

MOTHERFUCKERS AND THEY REALLY

DON'T WANT TO FIGHT YOU.

FOR CROCKET, IT WAS ABOUT

GETTING SOME MORE WAR.

I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT IT

HAPPENED THIS LAST WAR.

IT WILL HAPPEN IN THE NEXT

WAR, TOO.

IT'S PART OF THE VIOLENCE AND

THE SAVAGERY THAT'S INDUCED.

AND IT'S UGLY.

>> HI.

I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD--

I'M UP HERE.

WAY IN THE BACK.

>> OKAY.

>> IF YOU COULD SHED A LITTLE

BIT OF LIGHT ON THE MIRAGE.

IT CAME UP A COUPLE OF TIMES

IN YOUR BOOK AND I WAS

WONDERING IF IT'S SOMETHING

THAT YOU STILL FIND IN YOUR

CIVILIAN LIFE AND IF YOU COULD

GIVE US SORT OF A LITTLE BIT

MORE OF WHAT IT'S ABOUT IN THE

BOOK, BECAUSE IT'S PRETTY

VAGUE.

>> FOR ME, THE MIRAGE IS A

LIGHT MOTIF, A REPEATING THEME

THAT MEANS DIFFERENT THINGS AT

DIFFERENT POINTS.

IT'S, YOU KNOW, MY RIFF ON THE

FOG OF WAR.

IT'S A CONFUSING-- REALITY IS

DISTORTED BY THE MIRAGE AND

IT'S A PLACE WHERE, YOU KNOW,

MUCH OF-- INSIDE OF A MIRAGE,

MUCH OF THE VIOLENCE AND THE

DEPRAVITY OCCURS.

IT'S WHERE KIND OF THIS, YOU

KNOW, HIGH POINTS OF VIOLENCE

OCCUR.

WHEN I SIT DOWN AT THE FIRE

CIRCLE OF CORPSES AND I SAY I

FEEL AS THOUGH I'VE ENTERED

THE MIRAGE, THAT'S INSIDE,

THAT'S ME BEING INSIDE OF THE

MIRAGE.

>> SOMEBODY OVER HERE.

>> WE NEED TO GO TO THIS GUY

BECAUSE HE'S REALLY ANXIOUS.

>> OKAY.

>> HE MIGHT TACKLE ME IN A

SECOND.

OKAY.

>> SOMETHING A LITTLE KIND OF

UNRELATED TO THE BOOK AND LIKE

POLITICS IN THIS, BUT UPCOMING

ELECTION, THEY KEEP SPEAKING

ABOUT THE QUALIFICATIONS OF A

PRESIDENT HAVING MILITARY

BACKGROUND.

DO YOU FEEL THAT THAT WOULD

MAKE A BETTER PRESIDENT?

>> NO, I DON'T THINK THAT

WOULD NECESSARILY MAKE A

BETTER PRESIDENT AND, YOU

KNOW, TO SAY THAT THAT'S

NEEDED OR THAT THAT'S

SOMETHING THAT WE DESIRE,

THAT'S SOMETHING THAT'S

NECESSARY, I THINK THAT'S

WRONG.

I RECENTLY WROTE ABOUT CLARK,

AND I SAID, YOU KNOW, I DON'T

THINK-- HE WAS A GENERAL, YOU

KNOW, AND GENERALS WANTS THEIR

UNDERWEAR FOLDED A CERTAIN WAY

AND IF IT'S NOT FOLDED EXACTLY

THAT WAY, THEN THEY GET ANGRY.

LIKE MILITARY PROFESSIONALISM

IS MUCH DIFFERENT THAN

POLITICAL PROFESSIONALISM AND

THAT-- THAT, YOU KNOW,

POLITICS IS MESSY AND

CONFUSING AND SHOULD BE A

FIGHT, A BATTLE, AND THE

GENERAL, YOU KNOW, DOESN'T

HAVE ROOM IN HIS PSYCHOLOGY

FOR THAT KIND OF MOVEMENT.

YOU KNOW, I THINK-- WELL, I

THINK MANY THINGS ABOUT THE

BEST CANDIDATE FOR PRESIDENT.

YES?

OKAY.

>> YOU SPEAK IN THE BOOK ABOUT

YOUR EXPERIENCES AT BOOT CAMP,

AND IT'S BEEN MY EXPERIENCE

WITH EVERYONE THAT'S GONE

THROUGH BOOT CAMP FOR ANY OF

THE BRANCHES THAT IT'S A

TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE AND THAT

THEY HAVE A TENDENCY TO KNOW

THAT GOING IN.

WAS THERE ANYTHING ABOUT IT

THAT-- OR WERE YOU AWARE OF

THAT WHEN YOU WENT IN AND WHAT

ABOUT IT WHEN YOU GOT THERE

JUST SHOCKED YOU AND MADE YOU

NOT WANT TO BE THERE THAT

MUCH?

>> WELL, I MEAN I KNEW THAT

BOOT CAMP WAS GOING TO BE, YOU

KNOW, VERY-- WELL, VERY

CHALLENGING.

IT WAS GOING TO BE, YEAH, A

VIOLENT KIND OF MAD PLACE OR I

WASN'T GOING TO GET A LOT OF

SLEEP AND PEOPLE WERE GOING TO

YELL AT ME AND CALL ME NAMES

LIKE NO-PECKER LILY-WHITE

BITCH.

BUT NONETHELESS, YOU KNOW,

JUST LIKE I WAS PREPARED TO

KILL SOMEONE FROM 1,000 YARDS

AWAY, I WAS PREPARED TO COME--

I THOUGHT THAT I WAS PREPARED,

PRACTICALLY, TO COME UPON, YOU

KNOW, ENEMY DEAD.

THE PRACTICAL PREPARATION IS

MUCH DIFFERENT THAN THE ACTUAL

PSYCHOLOGICAL MOMENT OF BEING,

YOU KNOW, BEING BRUTALIZED

ESSENTIALLY.

YOU KNOW, IN BOOT CAMP, MOSTLY

MENTALLY, BUT AS WELL YOU KNOW

OCCASIONALLY PHYSICALLY.

SO IT'S A SHOCK REGARDLESS OF,

YOU KNOW, WHETHER OR NOT YOUR

BEST FRIEND OR YOUR BROTHER OR

YOUR UNCLE OR YOUR FATHER WENT

TO BOOT CAMP.

THEY CAN TELL YOU ALL OF THOSE

STORIES BUT YOU'LL NEVER KNOW

IT UNTIL YOU'RE SITTING THERE

AND THE GUY'S BARKING IN YOUR

EAR.

>> HI.

>> OVER HERE.

YOU MENTIONED IN THE BOOK THAT

YOU WERE KIND OF MILDLY-- IN

THAT THERE WAS SORT OF THIS

CONTRADICTION BETWEEN LIKE

RELIGION AND THE MILITARY.

I WAS WONDERING IF NOW THAT

YOU'RE OUT OF THE MARINES, IF

YOU HAD BECOME RELIGIOUS AGAIN

OR IF IT COMPLETELY TOOK IT

OUT OF YOU OR WHAT YOUR, LIKE,

DEAL IS ON THAT NOW.

>> YEAH, I'M NOT RELIGIOUS

NOW.

(Laughter)

>> OKAY.

>> I BELIEVE I ANSWERED THAT

QUESTION.

SORRY.

IF SOMEONE WERE FORCING ME TO

GIVE THEM AN ANSWER, I WOULD

CALL MYSELF AN ATHEIST.

>> SOMEBODY HERE.

PASS IT DOWN.

>> MY QUESTION IS BASED ON

PAGE 124 OF YOUR BOOK, WHERE

YOU TALK ABOUT YOU HAVE A

DREAM THAT YOU'RE READING AN

ARTICLE.

I WANTED TO KNOW WHY DID YOU

HAVE THAT DREAM AND HOW DID IT

AFFECT YOU?

>> WELL, I THINK I-- YOU KNOW,

I'M NOT A PSYCHIATRIST, AND I

READ FREUD'S INTERPRETATION OF

DREAMS MANY YEARS AGO, SO I'M

NOT SURE THAT I CAN GIVE THE

BEST INTERPRETATION OF THIS.

BUT CERTAINLY IT HAD TO DO

WITH MY FEAR OF MOVING INTO

COMBAT.

IT WAS A WAY FOR ME

SUBCONSCIOUSLY TO DEAL WITH

THE FEAR OF GOING FORTH AND

DYING AND POSSIBLY KILLING,

YOU KNOW, IN THE WAY THAT I--

AT DIFFERENT TIMES IN MY LIFE,

I THINK MY DREAMS HAVE KEPT ME

SAFE AS I HAVE ATTACHED

NARRATIVE TO CERTAIN HORRIBLE

EVENTS.

>> HI.

IT'S NOT RELATED TO THE BOOK,

BUT I WANTED TO GET YOUR POINT

OF VIEW OR OPINION ON THESE

QUESTIONS THAT I HAVE.

MY QUESTION IS WHAT ARE YOUR

BELIEFS OF WOMEN IN THE

MILITARY GOING TO WAR?

SHOULD THEY HAVE EQUAL STATUS

AS MEN IN WAR NOW?

>> SAME STATUS?

YEAH.

I MEAN I THINK THERE SHOULD BE

GENDER EQUALITY WELL,

EVERYWHERE IN THE WORLD, AND

THE MARINE CORPS IS NO

DIFFERENT, THE MILITARY IS NO

DIFFERENT.

WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE CAN

SERVE IN THE COMBAT ARMS

SHOULD HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH

GENDER.

IT SHOULD HAVE TO DO WITH

QUALIFICATIONS.

>> THE EVENING IS GETTING

LATE.

I THINK WE HAVE TIME FOR ONE